Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's out there.

So I met a female donor ...

At a friends and family gathering, hosted by a friend, I got chatting to a lady who had donated some of her eggs.

I didn't bring the subject up, honest, it came up as a random topic related to a different discussion.

Seems you ladies have a lot more to go through than us chaps to donate ...

Happy New Year :) and more about me

I would like to take a moment to wish a Happy New Year and best wishes for 2016 to my recipient families.

As a Dad of my own three boys, I know how important this time of year is.

Wondering about my 'anonymity' and whether there is any point to it, my friends and family know, and the NGDT know.

I'm sort of in the public eye in my area for local issues, and really I don't care too much about other's opinions about me if they don't agree with the fact that I am a donor.

I also wonder if any of the recipient families ever looked or found this blog. Who knows.

The snippet that I will pass on is that I donated at a private clinic located on the south coast of England.

Anyone looking in the right place on social media would be able to find my identity, or just add a comment.

Rambling over :)

Almost two football teams

I have had a very busy week, what with work, our three young boys, and some idiot having a head-on collision with my car which has written it off, I had forgotten that I had emailed the clinic for an update.

The email came this afternoon, to date, there have been:

• 8 girls
• 10 boys

born to 10 families.

In 2009 there were 7 births, in 2010 there were 3 births, and in 2012 there were 8 births.

Paperwork is all good for the next few years, and the clinic has an ample supply of straws should the families choose to have siblings for their children.

A very nice note was also included in the email from the clinic:

Your donations have made a huge difference to a very many peoples’ lives and we would like to thank you wholeheartedly for this.

It is all very humbling for me.

I would like to wish all of the families, the Mums and Dads, grandparents and above all - the children, all the best for the future.

Year 8 is here

It's been around 8 years since I started this journey, so here's a quick update from me.

My wife and I have three healthy, lovely young boys. We've chatted to them about, "Daddy helping out other grown-ups" which they accept without any difficult questions. I'm happy to answer those questions if/when they do arise.

I've just contacted my clinic to ask them if all of my donations have been used, and if not, whether they would like an extension to retain my donations - the paperwork I have gives 10 year retention.

Finally, and the piece I am also curious about - how many children / families are there?

I'm finally infertile!

Great news!

After 10 months - I am finally infertile.

There are a few sperm in my samples - but the doctor said during my telephone consultation that these are dead stragglers, and due to my prior high sperm count.

Okay - so goodbye contraception - hello spontaneity.

Try, try and try again

Another sample submitted today to see if my Vasectomy is now complete.

Fingers crossed - and in a few weeks time I'm hoping to get a letter back saying that everything is clear and I'm sperm-free...

To follow-up from an earlier post - the aches and pains of the vasectomy operation have pretty much gone.

I love my children - they are great - but three is enough for us, knocking on a bit now in my early 40's and well - to be honest I'm no longer a spring-chicken.  If in the meantime an 'accident' occurs due to the Rhythm Method Contraception we are using - then we'll just deal with our choice.  There's always room for one more ...

Sperm Count Fail Again

So another test and another failure. This is now getting very boring, having had the operation over 7 months ago.

So another pot and another test coming up soon ...!

Seven Months on since the Vasectomy

So I guess since my vasectomy in November, the general aches and pains are over, but there still needs to be much care when manipulating the area operated on - and intercourse that is as frequent as every day does result in a dull ache for the next 18 or so hours - something that I've not experienced before.

I hope after a year or so that this does pass - as it is not that comfortable but in the longer term it should all be worth it - in the meantime it's still condoms and the rhythm method.  The former is an absolute bore - imagine going for a meal, ordering the meal - then being fed a large portion of cardboard before it's time to eat.  When it comes round to the main course - sans wellington boot it's all a bit of a chore.

The rhythm method is not a bundle of laughs - of course the risk of a 'bonus' pregnancy is always there - and should it happen we'd of course go through with it - despite the huge financial impact and inconvenience, we'd not be able to live with ourselves.  Although not legally viable till, what, 24 weeks, a life is a life - and part of our family.

Okay - that's a lot about me - hoping for a 'negative' result on the sperm front very soon, positive for the all clear.

If you fail, then try again

Another fail on my sperm samples ... a few dead ones found in my 2nd, and 3rd sample.  1st and 4th were clear, but I need two samples without and trace of sperm before I'm given the 'all clear'.

So 5th sample went off a couple of weeks ago and awaiting the results.

Hoping for some better news.

Vasectomy Test Results ...

Well the test results came in from my Vasectomy. The good news is that my first sample was clear of sperm. The not terrible but not great news, is that my second sample was clear of live sperm, but they found a few dead ones.

So it's a couple more test pots for me ... and hopefully the all-clear will come in the next month or so.

A little disappointing as I'm really gagging to lose the rubber.

Waiting for the all clear

It's now been a couple of months since my vasectomy operation - and so that meant submitting a couple of sperm samples over a few weeks to see if I've got the 'all clear'. Hoping that indeed I am now infertile. Condoms take all the spontaneity away, and most of the sensation out of sex. The the rhythm method can be a bit messy (though to be honest that doesn't both me - though it does the washing machine) and there is a small risk of pregnancy with the rhythm method. Pain has pretty much gone - I'd say 95% in normal day to day activities. Can't wait for this all to be over - the anticipation and waiting is quite unbearable.

Two Months After Vasectomy

So two months later after my vasectomy - recovery is going well. The first first of my sperm sample tests is in around 6 weeks or so. In the meantime condoms and the rhythm method have been our birth control of choice. Although by around now I should be sterile - there's still a risk --- and indeed without completing the tests it's not worth the risk. Although everything 'downstairs' still hasn't returned to being entirely comfortable - I can see there's light at the end of the tunnel - and expect in 6 months or so everything to be back to normal.

UK Sperm Donor Satisfaction Survey

The UK's National Gamete Donation Trust (NGDT) are requesting that registered Sperm Donors Complete their Sperm donor satisfaction survey. The survey takes 5 minutes to complete and will help the NGDT to recommend positive changes that will make things better for future donors.

Vasectomy Completed!

Had my vasectomy yesterday.

It was fine - wasn't painful at all. No real pain after the operation, or today, the day after. Just walking a little more carefully and a slight ache. Didn't get the best nights sleep but not so bad considering.

After the op I returned to work after and completed my afternoon's tasks - and I'm back at work today also.

Can only that if you are considering having it - go for it.

Just got 4 months to wait before providing two sperm samples to see if the operation was a success - and I'll then be confirmed as sterile.

The surgeon showed me, at my request, the bits he removed - think two lots of 2.5cm long spaghetti - and that's what it looks like.

Final update for June

I got a nice email back from the clinic to say that the results of the screening had been returned to them and that my second, and final set of donations had been released for use - everything was in the clear.

My wife is booking in my vasectomy for later in the year - I'll be sure to give a update on how this works out and the procedures and tests that follow.

One final thing before I sign off for a while, I would like to wish all the my recipient parents, and their children, all the best for the future.

Screening Update

Completed my final screening for bloods and urine today.

When this has been processed, the sperm from my second donation cycle will be available should it be needed.

Families Helped Update

The Clinic updated me today so say that I'd helped eight families in total so far, I have an almost even split of boys and girls, and into double figures with the total number of children born.

Apart from the initial multiple births, no families have had second live births yet though it is a little early for that to take place ...

Lost Earnings Problem

The previous post was going to be my last - but I have to tell you about the latest lost-earnings problem.

The clinic decided that the maximum I could claim for Travel Expenses + Lost Earnings was £250. I ended up getting the HFEA involved, and I believe the clinic went through a lot of pain to clarify the rules and now they agree that reasonable expenses are unlimited and loss of earnings have a £250 cap.

I took holiday from work to make my second donation cycle, and the clinic then decided in their wisdom that as I took paid-holiday that they'd not pay me lost earnings. Now I don't know about you, but paid-holiday is when you go on holiday. If you work when you are on holiday then you are not on holiday, you are working.

A few bunfights later, the clinic accepted to pay for my 'lost' holiday - though it was rather silly.

Hopefully the next Sperm Donor that donate at the clinic I used won't have the same problem ...

Second Cycle Complete - And Goodbye!

Just a quick blog update to say that my second cycle was completed a few days ago.

There were still a few problems, the clinic forgot that I needed to do a wee test on my final visit, and a few less important things.

Much of this blame must sit squarely on the shoulders of the HFEA who make it difficult for Clinic's to reimburse Donors (it cost me over £1,300 to make my donations) and therefore when a Clinic that is not used to dealing with donors, does get a donor, they tend to make a bit of a mess of it.

So in summary, nobody died, I helped make some families, it cost me some money, it was a bit stressful, it was worth it.

So that's the end of this blog. Thanks for reading and goodbye!