- DI conceived are angry that they don't/won't know their biological parent(s). They feel that they have been abandoned/ignored/not complete.
- Some DI parent(s) angry that their children may track down their biological Mum/Dad and become best mates.
There are no perfect answers - just look at where you are in life - accept that you are where you are - and get on and enjoy your life/kids.
My wife said to me, you're doing a really kind thing Mr SeedMonkey, I am sure that the people you help become parents will be really thankful. I am sure she is right - it's just me being a the cynical person that I am.
Posts
5 comments:
Congratulations on becoming a sperm donor. I'm a former donor myself (in the early 80's), and have posted details of your blog on two discussion groups:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/spermdonors
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/DSR_Discussion
There are indeed some very angry donor-conceived people. Almost of the ones active on the internet are against anonymity and secrecy and some are against donor conception itself.
Personally, I believe that donor conception is basically a good thing, but that the children's interests should come ahead of the interests of the parents, clinics and donors. That seems to mean that donor-conceived people should know the circumstances of their conception, and that anonymous donation should not be possible.
Anonymous donation has finally been ended in the UK as well as in a few other countries, and it looks like there are moves afoot to record donor conception on UK birth certificates, so that the children will at some point have to find out.
I can understand that the donor conception parents may not want some stranger having any kind of parent role, but what the children want is more important. Being a donor isn't the same as being a "mum" or "dad", but knowing the identity of the donor is of fundamental importance to many donor-conceived people.
Ha,ha,ha - I could not get over how funny you are in claiming that you are selflessly helping families that you don't know. You are not. You are selfishly and irresponsibly abandoning your kids to strangers whom you've not checked out and done it so that you can get a free ride on the reproductive band wagon. You owe no unknown family any assistance in having children, but you do have a lot of responsibility towards those kids that you procreate through unknown families.
Dear ML,
Thank you for your thoughts and sharing that you are a former donor.
Did the clinic at the time track how many children resulted due to your donations?
Kind Regards,
Seed Monkey
Dear Frummy frummer,
Thank you for your fantasticly wrong insight.
And I thought that it was only me that was cynical.
Regards,
The Also Amused Seed Monkey
I donated about 30 times in the early 80's. I don't know how many people were conceived as a result, and I can't even be sure there were any at all, but I would imagine that there are maybe around ten people out there who have half my genes. It was all anonymous back then, but I said "yes" when asked if I would be open to contact if anyone wanted to get in touch later.
I wouldn't actively seek out anyone who may be my genetic son or daughter, but I'm registered at www.donorsiblingregistry.com and www.ukdonorlink.org.uk in case they want to find me.
Post a Comment